The Bjorgens

I remember my first “merging” lesson with my driving instructor.  I was on I-495 (the beltway) and it was rather busy.  The instructor told me to merge.  I think I literally held my breath and when I proceeded, I did it all wrong!  She told me to get off the beltway!  I was happy to do so, I think my heart was thumping so quickly it would beat out of my chest.  Well, you can’t get away with living in the DC area and not learn how to merge well.  Eventually merging became easy and second nature.  Well, after barely driving in Belize and having no merging lanes for three and a half years, when I faced my first “merge” just two weeks ago it was an epic fail.  Someone was merging on to the highway and I literally stopped my car as if there was a stop sign in the middle of a 70 mph highway.  My mom was stunned and I was confused.  What just happened?  I had forgotten how to merge.

It is the same I think for some of us missionaries that return from the field.  After FINALLY learning how to merge in a foreign country we are taken out of that country and put back into our “homeland”, only we have forgotten how to merge there, and it does not feel “homey”, it feels….weird. Here we are not really Belizean but not fully American anymore.  Something has changed and now we must relearn how to merge, and we must learn how to do it, merging is important-it’s how traffic on a busy highway keeps flowing.

For almost four years of our lives we have been under a tremendous amount of stress, and within that stress, God has taught us some amazing things.  We are not walking away unchanged.  We are CHANGED from the inside out.  Every heartache, tear, laughter, birth, disaster, triumph, disagreement, and understanding has been used by God to conform us more into His image.  We will never be the same and we don’t want to.   Imagine leaving the states one way but returning a different person.  The way we navigated the USA before may not be the way we want to navigate it now, so we have to relearn some things.

We left as a couple with one 12 month old and we are returning as parents of three young children.  We never really had an opportunity to be parents in the United States; MOPS, library reading time, taking the kids to the park, are ALL NEW. I find myself thinking, “What do I do? How do I act?”  Then those thoughts sound so silly.  I am an American in the USA!  This is my culture.  Even so, we have spent the last 3.5 years learning a new culture, learning how to say things in a different way, learning how to approach people differently than what we would in the USA, so we come home and you can see why we may feel disoriented at times.  In some ways I feel we left as young adults and we have come back and graduated to just “Adults”.  We survived a foreign country and lived to tell about it!  Not to mention the fact that we kept three kids alive there as well! Ha!

On top of the old merging lanes that we have to relearn there is a new merging lane.  Malachi.  The only way I can adequately describe what is happening in my heart is this way: I see two people when I look at myself in regards to Malachi’s diagnosis.  I see a confident woman who has to explain what is going on with him to almost everyone I meet.  I see her calmly explaining his disability.  I see her going from appointment to appointment, doing what she has to to get things done.  But the other “me” is standing next to that confident woman and she is not strong or confident at all.  She is doing what that confident woman really wants to do: sitting down, head buried in her hands, crying.  Every time I speak of Malachi calmly, every time I see a “normal” baby, that is what I want to do and how I see myself… crying.  Mostly because it is so overwhelming.  I don’t mind talking about Malachi, and I do love seeing the other kids, but, this is where I am at right now.  I am NOT hopeless, but I am still mourning and I don’t know when it will end.  So I find myself not only “reentering”  the USA, but also learning a new language and a new culture of having a disabled child.

What I know for sure is that my hope is in the Lord and that hope will not disappoint.  We have witnessed so many miracles in Belize that know beyond a shadow of a doubt that the Lord will take care of us.  I know He will guard my heart in all these things I am feeling right now.  I know He will continue to be with Evangeline and Ellis as they continue to adjust.  I know things will get easier because His yoke is easy and His burden is light.

We are so grateful to all those who are making our reentry and merging process much smoother.  We ask for your continued prayers.

Today was my second to last bible study with the ladies.  Next week I will be speaking to them for the last time.  To say this time is emotional is a great understatement.  I feel as if a piece of me will be missing for a time.  This ministry has been my heartbeat for the past 3.5 years.  I would like to share with you what I shared with them today.

10 Things I Hope You Will Do

1) Love each other

I John 4:7- Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.

2) Stop Gossiping

James 4:11- Brothers and sisters, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against a brother or sister or judges them speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it.

Ephesians 4:29- Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

3) Continue on in faith

Hebrews 11:1- Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

• Note: the greek word for the word “sure” in this verse means “exact imprint”.  So we could read: Faith is the [exact imprint] of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.

4) Be proud of the gospel of Jesus

Romans 1:16-17- For I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes: first to the Jew, then to the Gentile. For in the gospel the righteousness of God is revealed—a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: “The righteous will live by faith.”

5) Go and make disciples

Matthew 28:18-20- Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

6) Run the race with perseverance

Hebrews 12:1- Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us,  fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

7) Do not be conformed to this world

Romans 12:2- Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

8) Continue to help each other

Hebrews 13:16- And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.

9) Be humble

James 4:10-Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

2 Chronicles 7:14-  If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.

10) Love God

Matthew 22:37- Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment.

Only 9 more days to go before our Home Assignment in the states.  We are packing up and saying goodbye.  We had a yard sale and Evangeline had a difficult time parting with some of her toys.  Another difficult day was when we said “goodbye” to our puppy that we have had since Christmas “Tinsey” (named by Evangeline).  Evangeline loved Tinsey.  She is learning how to say her goodbye’s.  It is a good lesson to learn as she will be doing it more often than she realizes in the next few years.  Please note our new address below.

New Address:

Jonathan Bjorgen

441 S. Timberlake Ln.

Hartsville, SC 29550

If you are a church please begin send mail items here.  Also, Several of you have expressed interest in sending gift cards, this is where you can send them.  Thank you!

I wish I could explain to you the turmoil many missionaries have when leaving a country they have served in.  It is very strange.  On one hand we are very happy to be coming home to reunite with our families and our supporters.  We are also relieved at the prospect of getting the care Malachi needs.  On the other hand there is a strong desire to stay because this is where we have made a home for our family and have created a new family filled with our Belizean brothers and sisters in Christ.  The emotions that tug on our heart and the ups and downs can be overwhelming.  Pray for us during this time of transition.

Just this weekend, I (Mel) had the opportunity to speak at the Brethren Assemblies Ladies Retreat.  The theme was “Living by Faith”.  I spoke five times covering the “Three Ingredients of Faith”, “Noah- Unwavering Faith”, “Abraham- Faith, Getting it Right”, “Rahab”, and “Encouraging you in your Faith Walk”.  It was a wonderful time of fellowship.  It was my first time speaking at a retreat and I experienced God in a new way, I would love to do it again!

A few things John has done in the past few months is be one of the leaders a a young men’s retreat held at the mission base; here, several of the young men made the decision to follow in believers baptism.  He also attended a smaller version of a “Passion” conference with Pastor Kenny and the young boys.  In addition to this, watched all three kids for three days while I was gone to the retreat.  What a great husband I have!

We are remaining busy and are loving this last month being here, relishing our friends.

How is Malachi?

We get this question all the time and it is a difficult one to answer.  His improvement is very slow if anything.  We have seen improvement in his neck control and the other day he did hold a bottle with open hands for about 30 seconds.  He is not crawling or sitting up on his own, and is having a difficult time with balance.  Even though his neck control has improved he still is “floppy”.  We are praying that physical therapy will make him more mobile.  Thank you for your prayers and concern.

Many of you have been waiting patiently and giving us a lot of space to process the new information we have received on Malachi.  Thank you for praying for us and encouraging us.  We may not understand everything, but we are trying our best to navigate through this, trusting that the Lord will reveal himself in due time.

Below are some FAQ’s that we can now answer for you:

When are you going on Home Assignment?

Originally we were going to leave in August, but some wise colleagues told us it would be better to not attempt to transition right as school starts.  So we moved it to June.  After we found out Malachi has CP we have decided we would like to get him started on his therapy as soon as we can.  So we are leaving around the first of May.  That was unexpected and quite sudden.  Please keep us in prayer as we pack up and say goodbye (only six weeks!).

Where will you live in the United States?

For at least 6 months we will be in Hartsville, SC.  Malachi will receive excellent care there and we have lived there before so we have family and friends as a great support.  Beyond the first six months we can not say how God will lead us.

Are you still going to be missionaries?

The answer to this is “Yes”.  This is NOT a simple answer though.  We are asking for your faith in us.  We are seeking the Lord and godly counsel on what to do next.  God has called us to be missionaries and He has not released us from that calling yet.  We have done a lot of talking and praying about this one.  We believe God wants us to move forward in our missionary journey in faith and trust in Him. We know now what Malachi needs and where we go we will be sure his needs will be met properly.  There may be some big changes up ahead for us but we are hoping and praying to still be missionaries, please pray to that end with us and please continue your support.  We will let you know further details about this but we ask you to be patient with us.

What will you do on your Home Assignment?

Home Assignment is when missionaries come home and report back to all the churches and individuals that support them and raise any shortfall in their financial support.  John will be doing most of the traveling and on the days he is not traveling we are devoting ourselves to support raising.  Please, if you or someone you know, or a church you know is looking to support a missionary family let us know!  We are going to be working hard and would like to complete our fund raising within the year.  We believe He is able to do all things!

What do you need?

1) Prayer.  We need your prayers as we say goodbye to a village we love and people that have become our family.  Pray for the adjustment that the kids will have to make (and us) to culture in the USA.  It really is overwhelming.  Pray for Malachi.  Pray for our support. Pray that God will grant us wisdom beyond our years.

2) Encouragement.  Drop a note, call, comment on this blog.  We need encouragement!

3) Gift cards. Some have asked how they can help us with our physical needs.  We will need appropriate clothing and groceries upon our re-entry to the states.  Gift cards from places such as Target, Wal-mart, Old Navy or Belk will help us out a lot. Please contact us if you are interested in helping us this way.

Malachi was able to get his MRI today and received a positive diagnosis.

Malachi has Cerebral Palsy.  The basics are:

The term cerebral palsy refers to any one of a number of neurological disorders that appear in infancy or early childhood and permanently affect body movement and muscle coordination but don’t worsen over time. Even though cerebral palsy affects muscle movement, it isn’t caused by problems in the muscles or nerves.  It is caused by abnormalities in parts of the brain that control muscle movements.  The majority of children with cerebral palsy are born with it. [ref]

While in certain cases there is no identifiable cause, typical causes include problems in intrauterine development, asphyxia (lack of oxygen due to breathing difficulty) before birth, hypoxia (oxygen deprivation) of the brain, and birth trauma during labor and delivery, and complications in the perinatal period or during childhood [ref]

With all the difficulty surrounding his birth and the ensuing stay in the NICU, it’s not surprising that he sustained some permanent neurological damage.

He shows both increased resistance in some muscles (hypertonia), especially on his right side, and low muscle tone in others (hypotonia) like his neck and trunk.

The good news is that he will not get any worse than he is now, and that with physical and occupational therapy, we are likely to see improvement, but we don’t know how much.  The bad news is that there is no known cure for any type of cerebral palsy and he will likely have physical limitations throughout his life.  We don’t know if or when he will be able to sit up or walk or any other developmental milestone.  All we can do is give him therapy and see how he responds and develops.

Thankfully, although this is news to us, it’s nothing that our heavenly Father has not already seen and planned and we are confident that he will provide our every need, physically, emotionally and spiritually.  We know that this will be used to conform both us and Malachi more to the image of his Son, and will open up avenues for ministry that we’ve never had before.  Your continued prayers are much appreciated at this time.

You will have to pardon me being so brief. I am so exhausted and I don’t really want to think, but I know you all love Malachi and are praying for him. Today the neurologist confirmed what I already knew: Malachi is a 10 month old that acts like a four month old. He will get an MRI sometime in the next several days. The neurologist will read the MRI for me that day . He could tell me nothing new and said we would have to wait and see what his brain looks like. He does believe that Malachi will improve, but it will be a slow process including physical and occupational therapy. He said we will not know his estimated limits until we see the results of the MRI. Of course we know that God has no limits.
Please pray that I can get the MRI scheduled for Thursday or Friday. The doctors office is very busy and it needs to pass through insurance. They understand my need to get it done quickly but seemed to be in no hurry which is frustrating for me. Malachi is doing very well. Please continue to pray for me. That I get sleep and that the Lord will continue to strengthen me. Pray for John as well. Thank you for your prayers. We love you all.

Malachi is now 9.5months old. As the months have gone by I have been concerned about him reaching his milestones. For a while we were in a “wait and see” mode. We decided that the waiting is over and recieved the thumbs up from the Lord to move forward. To put it simply Malachi is very behind in some of his motor skills, especially his neck control. Sometimes it is as if I am handling a 4-6 months old instead of an almost 10 month old. We decided to act and write a pediatrician and seek advice and everyone said that now is the time to act.

Malachi was not able to get the MRI’s or CAT SCAN he needed or the neurological tests he needed after his traumatic birth. It is possible that he has some trauma to the brain due to lack of oxygen, however we do not know anything conclusive.

The baby and I will be traveling to Hartsville, SC on Saturday to see the pediatrician that we have been speaking to. Miraculously they got us into a specialist on Tuesday. Also our wonderful mission board is helping us with airfare. We will return to Belize the following Sunday.

I am asking you to pray that God will continue to open the doors for this trip. Pray for little Malachi that they will be able to pinpoint the problem and come up with a solution. Pray for me that I will be able to sleep and have a clear head in the coming days. Pray for the girls, especially Ellis, because they will be away from me and are not used to that. Pray for John as he holds down the fort in Belize.

If you live in Hartsville and are interested in conecting, let me know. Thank you for your prayer support during this time.

We were beaming from ear to ear on Sunday.  Something that can only be attributed to the Glory of God happened.  Three people were baptized.  Ashely Kidder, an MK was baptized.  She is such a sweet girl with a tender heart to the Lord, and we are so happy she made that step. The other two were our good friends Robert and Nadine.  God has captured their hearts in a mighty way.  John and I are praising the Lord.  We can not describe the joy we feel in our hearts, it is only the joy that the Lord can give.  Seeing them grow in the Lord and put their faith in Jesus has been an indescribable encouragement from our Heavenly Father.  I am finding myself at a loss for words, so I will let the pictures do the talking.  Please take a moment to offer a prayer of thanksgiving to God for His wonderful works in the village of Gales Point Manatee.

Us with Nadine and Robert with their three kids.  They have two girls and a boy as well!

Nadine and I.  She has become such a great friend.

Robert’s Baptism.  He is saying “Yes, I follow Jesus Christ!”  Amen!

Raised to walk in a new life with Him! Thank you Lord.

Nadine’s Baptism.  Buried in the likeness of His death.

For the past year I have become deeply acquainted with a few Psalms.  They have been in the trenches of my depression with me, they have been the encouragement when I have needed it the most, and they have been challenging me to look at God in a deeper way.  All my life I have thought of God as only an authoritative figure in my life.  I envision Him to be HUGE, sitting on a thick, golden gleaming throne blinding my eyes.  I am awe-struck by God but He also left me scratching my head.  I found myself thinking, “Why can’t I relate to God like I can relate to Jesus?” Fully realizing that they are the same person.  Jesus knows what it is to be human, but then God must know too, right?  When I picture Jesus, I see this kind, bearded man, and He is always hugging me and laughing, and then I see what He did for me on the cross, and then I imagine Him ascending into heaven and meeting Him up there one day.  Warm fuzzies.  Why could I not get warm fuzzies with God? I put God in a box.  I only saw Him as this HUGE God lording over me. He IS HUGE and AMAZING and He IS the Lord of my life, BUT He also understands me and protects me like any Father would a child.

The Psalms really helped me with this.  I began seeing phrases in the Psalms like, “The Lord is my shelter”, “in the shadow of Your wings”, “The Lord encamps around me”.  These phrases and others like it are all throughout the Psalms, a constant reminder that the Lord is our PROTECTOR.  The more I searched, the more I understood that God is  SO MUCH MORE THAN I IMAGINED.  He can’t be put in a box because He is EVERYWHERE and what is more, He cares deeply for me.  So much that when I am in trouble He “encamps” around me.  Psalm 34:7 says: “The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear Him, and rescues them.” The word “encamps” means- “To set up a camp or live in a camp”.  Not only does God protect us but He is there to stay.  He is not going to leave us or forsake us.

One of the most beautiful visuals of protector that we have from the Lord is “the shadow of His Wings”. Psalm 63:7 says, “For you have been my help and in the shadow of your wings I sing for joy.”  Just imagine the Lord God flying over you and flapping His big strong wings and you are walking underneath Him in the shadow of those wings; you know He is there and He is hovering over you protecting you as you walk through the dark valley’s of life.

A few months ago I gave myself a project of going through every Psalm and underlining every verse that had to do with God’s protection over us.  WOW!  What a journey that was.  I noticed two very interesting things. 1) More often than not, the psalmist was experiencing God’s protection IN THE MIDST OF TRIALS.  God did not keep the psalmist out of harms way all the time, they had to walk through many trials, but, God was with them protecting the along the way.  God does not promise that we will not go through trials but He does promise to hold our hand, carry us, support us, CAMP around us.  2) never in any of His promises does God take the offensive, He is always defending.  I never read that God had a bow and arrow, sword, or sling; but I did read that God is our shield, our rock, a fortress, a tent.  He is FIRM.  Just like in Eph. 6:10-17 when He tells us to put on the whole armor.  We are not told to attack the Devil but to “stand firm” against His schemes.

Slowly but steadily my heart began to unfold.  My God, God the Father, IS personal.  He can relate to me.  In fact He sees me so much better than I see myself, His care for me runs so deep.  Deep enough to follow me around and pitch a tent and live with me in times of trouble, to be right there to protect me. A true Father in every sense of the word. Warm Fuzzies.

Below I have categorized all the protection promises from God in the Psalms.  It is my desire that they will bless your heart as they have mine and that in your times of trouble you can run to Him with open arms.  We need to abandon ourselves and surrender to God.

Ps. 144:2- He is my steadfast love and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer my shield and He in whom I take refuge.

Protection Verses

• The Lord is a SHIELD- Psalm 3:3, “But you, O Lord, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head.”

5:12, 7:10, 18:30, 18:35, 28:7, 47:9, 59:11, 84:11, 91:4, 115:9,10,11, 119:114

• The Lord is our REFUGE- Ps. 46:1-”God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.”

5:11, 11:1, 16:1, 25:20, 28:8, 31:1, 31:2. 43:2, 57:1, 61:3, 61:4, 71:3, 71:7, 91:2, 91:4. 91:9, 94:22, 142:5, 143:9

• The Lord protects us in the SHADOW OF HIS WINGS- Ps.63:7-”For you have been my help and in the shadow of your wings I sing for joy.” 36:7, 57:1, 61:4, 63:7, 91:1

• The Lord is my ROCK-  Ps. 18:2- “The Lord is my rock and my fortress and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.

19:14, 31:2, 31:3, 62:1, 71:3, 78:35, 94:22

• The Lord is our RESCUER- Ps. 18:17- “he rescued me from my strong enemy.

Ps. 18:19, 18:48, 91:15

• The Lord is our SUPPORT: Ps. 18:18- “they confronted me in the day of my calamity but the Lord was my support.

18:35

• The Lord is our STRENGTH: Ps.18:39- “For you equipped me with strength for the battle; you made those who rise against me sink under me.”

18:32, 28:7, 28:8

• The Lord is our DELIVERER: Ps. 41:1-2 “Blessed is the on who considers the poor! In the day of trouble the Lord delivers him; the Lord protects him and keeps him alive.”

18:48, 50:15, 70:5, 72:12, 106:43, 107:13,19,20,28, 116:8, 138:7

• God is our HELPER: Ps. 53:4-”Behold, God is my helper; the Lord is the upholder of my life.”

70:5, 86:17, 115:9,10,11, 121:2, 124:8

• The Lord is our REDEEMER: Ps. 26:11- “But as for me, I shall walk in my intefrity; redeem me, and be gracious to me.

Ps. 31:5, 34:22, 36:7, 55:18, 72:14, 77:15, 78:35, 103:4, 106:10, 107:2

• The Lord is the STRONGHOLD OF OUR LIVES: Ps. 27:1- ” The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear?  The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?”

37.39, 94:22

• The Lord is my SHELTER- Ps. 27:5- “For he will hide me in his shelter in the day of trouble; he will conceal me under the cover of his tent; he will lift me high upon a rock.

34:7, 61:4

• The Lord is our RESTORER: Ps. 30:3- “O Lord, you have brought up my soul from Sheol; you restored me to life from among those who fo down to the pit.”

• The Lord is our PRESERVER: Ps. 31:23- The Lord preserves the faithful.”

37:28

• The Lord is my SUSTAINER: Ps. 55:22- Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.

• The Lord is my PROTECTOR: Ps. 91:14- Because he holds fast to me in love, I will deliver him; I will protect him, because he knows my name.

• The Lord is my KEEPER: Ps. 121:2- The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand.

Ps. 121:7-8

• Ps. 25:15- “My eyes are ever toward the Lord, for He will pluck my feet out of the net.

• Ps. 40:2- “He drew me up from the pit of destruction, our of the miry bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure.